the ANGER is here

So I think the anger phase is here. Everyone told me it would come. I have never been this angry for this long about anything. When I think about Tommy right now the emotion I feel the most is anger. When I see his face or hear his name or hear his voice I am overcome with anger. It is so strong that it makes my stomach sick. It's so bad that I could not be civil to him when I saw him on Saturday. I am also angry with those few who are showing him support in his very bad choices. I just feel angry at everyone that has anything to do with him...but mostly I feel indescribable anger toward him. It isn't quite as bad as the pain I felt...but almost. I never knew a person could hurt that much... and now I am surprised that I could feel this much anger. I just read what I have written so far...that's a LOT of anger! LOL! I do still fall apart and cry almost every day. I haven't so far today. I'm thinking maybe I won't. :) I have had his name tattooed over my heart for 11 years. Yesterday I had it covered by a butterfly tattoo. I chose the butterfly because it symbolizes a new beginning. I am ready for one of those. I am ready for a life in which I can be happy with my God and my family. I don't have to have a man there and right now I don't want one. I'm sure that somewhere out there, there is one that God has picked out especially for me and he will find me in God's time. Until then, I am just fine on my own. :) Please keep praying for us.